Kind of like I had to hit a little dark low before I could move on. The darkest hour is before the dawn.
I see a great future. I have hope. I see who I want to be. Where I want to go.
It feels pretty solid and pretty great.
Chris and I both recognized I needed to do something for myself. I'm thinking about what this thing could be and it's sending off sparks. I want to travel. Peru's my number one, but just anywhere. I want to take guitar lessons. Work on my art. Maybe take glass blowing lessons. Keep writing. And boy oh boy, do I ever need to get this physical activity in order.
Marie was talking about a shopping trip to the states that she took with Sean. And I started thinking about the healthy lady I want to be, and how great it would be to go into the stores I love and buy clothes I love. Fuck it bitches-fashion is important to me. I'm not happy at this weight, and I just want to wear some killer clothes that make me feel awesome.
I look in vogue and see a dress that makes my lips tingle and heart race. Now that's a little bit of love and lust there.
And Chris, my goodness Chris. I feel like our relationship is great. Unique and special. But I need to nurture it, appreciate it always, and show him like he's always showing me.
So bright new beginnings. Let's go.
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